About being sure

I always thought that someday I’d be sure about everything. I always thought that someday I’d have all the answers and no doubt. I always thought….but I was wrong. We’ll never be sure about any thing in this life. We’ll never have all the answers and no doubt. There’ll always be doubts, and sometimes they are important doubts that will never disappear.

One of mistakes that people often make is about being sure that they are loved. People want to be sure that his/her lover love them from the bottom of the heart. And if – after some time of closeness, they suppose that aren’t loved any more, they think it’s time to end the relationship because there are…doubts. But the point is…who can sure about being loved?

People are different, think in different ways, have different cultures, values, ideals, points of view. And they express their feelings and their love in different ways too. And they feel they are loved in different ways too. How can I be sure I’m loved if the other express his feelings in a different way I’m expecting? Maybe, for a girl, being sure about being loved is having a guy that says “I love you” everyday. But maybe he’s not the kind of person that express his feelings this way, by words. Maybe, for him, love is expressed when he cooks the dinner just because he knows she’s too tired to make it. So…she keeps having doubts about being loved cause he never says he loves her – even if he loves her from the bottom of the heart.

Maybe the answer is finding out the way the other express her/his feelings, accept this way, understand it and don’t demand that the feeling be expressed the way we want to. But maybe…maybe even if we find out the way the other express her/his feelings, we keep having doubts. I mean…maybe we’ll never be sure about this, or about how much we are loved. And…would this be a reason to say “oh, okay, I’m not sure, so I’m leaving”, if the relantionship’s going as smoothly as it should be? Can you see? Maybe you’ll never know. Maybe you’ll never be sure if you’re really loved. Maybe you’ll live forever thus. And…maybe…this is the way you must live – carrying the doubts, loving the other even if there are doubts, beyond the doubts. ‘Cause the meaning of love isn’t loving just because you’re loved. The meaning of love is loving above all the things, in all the circumstances – loving even if there are doubts about the existence of love itself.